Quality Matters

I have made a terrible mistake.  After blindly releasing one of my poems on the internet for everyone to see, I went back and listened to it and the quality is unbearable.  People do not release anything with this low of a recording quality.  Nobody.  Not even the people making videos of their friends being kicked the balls.  This is supposed to be a piece of work that I've spent so much time on that I think other people will like it and possibly tell people they respect about it.  For a long time  had a short series of videos that I had recored as practice posted, but I kept the private.  I knew there were going to be unforeseen problems, and of course as soon as I make one of them public, I figure out what the problems are.  The videos are terrible.  Sure, I might not look like a chump if they can listen long enough to hear any of the words.  But there's a pretty good chance that only people that know me would ever do that.  I still like the whole concept for the mini-series though.  I re-worded a few of my hits and put them together, things worked out quite well.  Quite well indeed.

Gains

Putting a finished or mostly done piece of work to the side for a while is definitely a good way to think about things.  After not listening to any of my recordings for quite a while, I first thing that I noticed was that the "jam" track was a lot better than I had been giving it credit for.  I remember how difficult it was to improvise music with myself since not only did I have to memorize the other part, but it doesn't ever change to accommodate slight mistakes or hesitations that can be fairly common during a performance.  That being said, the actual mix of computer generated music and improvisational bass guitar are at the same time wildly different and blended fairly well.  I made a good choice by picking a consistent strumming technique that fits with the beat nicely to allow me to improvise.  I remember playing the song quite a few times, so I had a pretty good idea of the structure by the time I recorded it.

Personal Development (novel goal)

I now have yet another new writing area which contains a single piece.  This is supposed to be where I was going to write the 10 to 20 pages stories.  So far, that has not happened, but that is still the intention of the writing area.  My previous writing entries have been very short, but so far they have all been connected in some way.  If they isn't a direct connection, there is at least a connection via the topic being written about.  My intenion of this new area is not only to increase the length of the pieces that I'm writing about, but also to change the topic and secenery at random.  At first this may not seem like the best practice, to just write randomly, but if that were not my intention, I would simply create a piece for one of my previously estabilshed categories.  The point of my new space is to have somewhere that I can create new topics that are intentionally irrelevant to any of my current storylines and try to make them into something that is expansive.  The goal would be to eventually end up with something that could be novel length or play length instead or my typical experimental entries.

running around

Soldier, I said flank right.  That means you flank right NOW!

Sir, yes sir!

With his hand on his helmet, he scurried away as quickly as his legs could take him considering he was carrying a 70lbs bag and slightly oversized boots that aren't exactly the best for high speed activities anyway.  Most of the other guys seemed to fit into their boots a little bit better, but who knows why that is.  Everyone did the same amount of training, and if anything Mark seemed to hit the weights a little more than a few of the others.  But they have what I guess you would describe as "ankle muscle" which is in this instance something that would be kinda handy.

Mark liked to think that he was always gearing up towards combat, whether he knew it or not.  How else can one fit in when you're in a place like this anyway?  You'd be surprised the direction that life can lead some people.  Thinking back to the people he's met in his life, who would have expected some of the things that they've done.  It's not like people can judge you anyway, that's one of the benefits that Mark noticed very early on.

I don't see anything.

Are you blind or stupid?

Shut up and stay down!

Oh, the old familiar dialogue.  By now, Mark's sure that outsides wouldn't really understand what's going on, but he's grown to like that sort of thing after a while.  The Captain doesn't really need to throw on the extra "stupid" bit, but he knows Mark well enough to remember that it digs him just that little bit extra.  And with all the people around here, he definitely doesn't have to do those little bits that lets a guy know he's remembered.

When Mark first arrived, he knew that banter and other sort of teasing was to be expected to some extent, that's the nature of things.  But what can't really just be prepared for is when you start to form sort of bonds with this back and forth.  And some guys just tend to know each other for a long time, whatever the reason may be.

Looks like we're moving.

Stay low and shut your mouth.

I know what I'm doing.

What did I just say to you?  Now I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that.

The sun was starting to get low in the sky, but not low enough to be directly in your eyes and definitely not low enough to start to reduce visibility.  The target that the Captain was talking about was just on the other side of a small hill.  The long, dry grass in the field swayed lightly back and forth in the wind.  There really wasn't anything that Mark could claim was getting in his way.

Mark was the kind of guy that always had his head in things, but not quite in the way that the people around him expected.  And the obvious thing to assume from here is that he didn't really want to be where he was.  That's pretty much how things go in whatever you're doing.  As soon as you stop wanting to be there you start to lose focus, you stop doing what you're supposed to be doing, and eventually an intelligent person will find something else to do with their life.  So, what exactly is Mark's problem?

Being the kind of guy that people sort of have to get to know, Mark can get away with a few things every now and then.  It's pretty much been like that his whole life.  In high school if Mark got into a fight or two, he wouldn't really get labeled as the kind of guy that goes around starting fights.  People knew him and they never really questioned this.  Or if he forgot to do his homework once in a while, his friends still pretty much assumed that he was going in the right direction and wouldn't really think about him the way they might if someone else were to  do that.

And of course, people got to know Mark because he would make them get to know him.  It's pretty hard to ignore someone that's in the gym that much, especially when that's what you do.  But some people seem to get to know each other a little more quickly than others.  It was actually a strange day today.  This isn't in the way that Mark couldn't seem to get anything right, or anything like that.  Those were almost to be expected to some extent and when people know each other for a long enough period of time, these things are often skimmed over or forgotten quickly.  The strange part is that Mark wasn't with the group of guys he's normally around.

Maybe it was just the time of day.  It had been a pretty long week after all.  Mark had been working a little harder than usual for reasons he wasn't exactly aware of.  Things don't always need to make sense or be explained in some simple, easy to swallow version.  Sometimes people just do things or think things and that's the way things are.  "He's already calling me stupid, isn't he" Mark kept thinking to himself.

Spotted!  Drill's over.

text1

It was a bitter cold outside.  Lately this type of weather was pretty much expected, or at least it should have been, but to me it always seemed like a surprise.  You know that the winter months are going to be cold, but when you get there, for some reason you don't really expect it to ever be quite that cold.

There was a light drift of snow falling, slowly visible against the dark backdrop that was hovering over the area.  About this time of year there's usually more snow on the ground, but we recently had a rain storm that washed most of it away.  Not really much to say except yet another reason for the cold to be just a little bit more surprising.  That's the way things are in this type of area.  Sure people complain, people complain wherever you are.  The next thing you know the summers are going to be too hot.

Inside, people were restless.  Quiet.  Everyone was busy, but not really around.  The air was stale from inactivity.  It was one of those nights were everyone just stayed home without really having much of a reason.  Things were lively though.

Hey, look who it is.

I see somebody is glad to see me.

Are you kidding?  We're just getting tired to slapping each other around.

So that was fast, right?

Ey!  Look who's being the funny guy again.

Sure, whatever.

Alright.

So, what are we doing?

You're really still asking that?

It's one of those things you say.

Yup, it is.

It's not that there weren't many people, there were just enough.  And things were quieter than they had been, even with a few people showing up and leaving here and there.  Things were quite in a good way if you can imagine that.  It was a sort of enjoyable, fun stale air.  It might not make sense, but that's the way things were.

Hey!

What?

Are you paying attention?

What do you mean?

What did I just say to you?

The funny guy thing?

That's the way things are.

I'm not following.

You mean you have a problem Mr. Fancy?

Huh?

Exactly.

So now we know it's possible.

Oh, that makes sense.

Does this look like fancy guy opinion time?

So, I'm not the funny guy?

I didn't even notice, but everyone had suddently left and was replaced by two or three times as many people.  There was a difference that you couldn't quite put your finger on, but it was there.  Things were a lot louder, but you might say quieter.  You couldn't tell though.  I couldn't tell, and I was there.

The snow had stopped falling and the moon was bright against the dark sky.  If you were still long enough, you could feel how cold it really was.  The illuminated outline of clouds could be seen puffy and covering up most of the stars in the sky.  You could see the non-movement of the dark sky all around the moon.

Building Blocks

I need to think of short story ideas.  I was going to aim for a full-length novel as the goal of ideas, but that might be too ambitious.  Ten to twenty pages would be a pretty good start for a short story.  Several short stories.  That's enough room to have several well-developed characters, more than one scene, and even a decent direction to the storyline.  I think I'm going to try and leave the whole "plot twist" out for now, since that's not really the point.  I know this isn't actually something I've accomplished, but after my latest piece of writing, I pretty much know that this is what I need to do.  There are lots of ways I could use the writing I'm doing and it's pretty interesting by itself, but I'm having a really hard time justifying it as something that could be considered popular.  I've definitely got the whole, enjoy what I'm doing thing down.  Sometimes I can be critical of my work, but I keep getting the feeling that most writing that is sold to a wide market has more of a flow to it.  There's an element that makes people want to keep reading it and I think this is a reflection of what the writer wanted to do.  I want to write stories that are readable and I hope this can be a reflection of the idea behind the story.

Getting Things Down

Now that I've started writing again, I'm finding it a lot harder than expected to not write.  This might not make a lot of sense, but it's actually working out quite well for me so far.  The secret is to have a time and a place for everything.  I feel that I need to mention this because there is obviously a use for doing a lot of writing even if it's not exactly in the "optimal" direction (more on this later?).  That's how you get better at what you do, if it's really something that you care about and want to do.  But, writing that you are setting aside to be part of a collection or a book, something that you want to get exactly right as it was could be scrutinized at some point, well, that you want to put some thought into.  You don't want to just write the first thing that pops into your head (although you can), you want to have some sort of plan or idea, even a vague one.  And of course after you've set it aside for a while, you'll need to go back and edit to make sure you didn't overlook anything.  So, when you start writing too much, this process can start to get weighed down a bit.  I've found this difficult, but I'm satisfied with what I have so far.

Considerations

When I stumble into some money, my first investment is going to be a fret-less instrument.  I guess this would be my first investment that may turn out to be completely useless because I can't play it at all.  It's sort of a long term goal of mine to be able to play without the aid of frets.  I'm not sure exactly what that means, but I think it has something to do with knowing the scales extremely well.  How else would you do it except by ear?  Maybe people just sort of guess as to how they would play without frets.  Anyway, that just leads to my even more long term goal of eventually being able to pick up a classical instrument like a standing bass and play that.  Not only do you have to know fret-less, but you're also using a bow.  I'm not sure how hard a bow is going to be, so I just sort of pretend that part will be easy.  I guess the point of this post is to announce that I am on my way to having a good sense of what my scales should sound like, whatever that might mean.

Advanced Practice

I think it's about time to discuss multi-tasking during practice.  I still think that I'm not really making any sort of how-to or instructional documentation here.  What I would like to mention though, is that I've found a way to make my practice time a bit more complex.  The second half of my practice time is spent doing scales.  While I'm doing scales, I try to keep time in my mind.  This may not sound like a big deal, but when you start to go faster it's a fairly good indication that you're able to keep things consistent.  I think that just doing something in that area is going to improve my overall skill eventually.  Without really thinking about it too much, I will have a sort of base that I'll be able to think back to.  Additionaly, it's an enormous help with my hesitations.  Unless you're playing sheet music, people rarely practice putting a pause into anything that they play, but it's obviously a part of music and it's a lot more difficult than you might expect until you try to practice it.

Book Management

I think there is probably an optimal speed and amount that a person should be reading.  I remember in school when you were assigned something to read, you got it done because you were expected to.  Now that I choose my own reading material (which may or may not be based on things I've been assigned) and set my own deadlines, I've noticed that I don't always finish a book as quickly as I'd like.  I guess this can be strange to say since I don't actually set any deadlines for myself, but you still don't like to feel like you've gone backwards in any way.  I think this happens from some of the larger works that I try to read, but I haven't been able to really blame anything in general so far.  I think I'm going to credit it to poor life management skills.  This may or may not be a smart answer, but I probably won't ever go into that.  The point is, if I make sure I have plenty of time to get things done, then I'm going to be less stressed and enjoy what I'm doing.

Taking Shape

Now that I have several pieces of writing completed for what I have determined to be my slightly new style, I think it's time to complain about it.  I recently decided that it was about time to start working on volume as an asset to my writing.  This means that I'm making descriptions longer, conversations longer, and generally the storyline and scenes are longer.  I'm even dabbling with adding more characters.  Sadly though, the truth is that my new style is pathetically similar to my previous style.  Yes, it is definitely longer, but compared to an extremely brief style that was previously implemented, it is simply not what one would expect from a "more wordy" style.  Fortunately for me, I still enjoy all of the writing that I do and I find myself extremely entertaining.  Sadly for my bank account and future in textbooks, it does not look anything like what one reads in a novel or play or anything else that can be widely found.